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OCTOBER SUCKS.. (hopefull for the next month)

Yeah.

I'm gaining weight. From stress. From hang-ups. From everything.

Maybe gaining a bit is good, after hitting the scales to an all-time low of 140 pounds.

Now I'm 146.. going up to my ideal of 150 pounds.

So much has happened.

Lola got herself a new complication. Liver cirrhosis.

Luckily my tita is here to help us (but I feel for her, her frustartions of going to Palawan was messed up, turning her hard-earned vacation money into lola's hospital fund)

Hope I can help her next time she visits us. I will take her some place where we can find serenity. Now is just the wrong time. Wrong place. Wrong situation.

Darn.

*************************************

I've lonely for 4 years. It sucks. Oh yes, it's been four years.

80 years more for me to smell the fresh pain..

the china that have never been used..

the sheets that have never been slept with..

It was called the ship of dreams..

Naglayag na siya.

I don't know kung naiwanan na ako.

Hope there's time. More time.

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