my share of FEAR FACTOR


After a few months of not going out since I got this new job, I finally made contact with humans last night.

An officemate invited me for a two hours of open bar and party in Makati. It's her birthday party so I showed myself with a friend turned me into a 'plus one' that night.

It's Makati. No smoking indoors. So I went out to light a bum and mingled with a few people. So few they're just two. (Aside from my friends inside and my so-called 'plus one') I was introduced by the host to these two people. Suddenly I felt something weird.

I don't know how to start a conversation with these people!

I introduced myself, what I do, where I go..Usual 'spark up speeches you might have a chat for a few hours' sentences. I dunno what happenned, I just don't know how to play it cool. I'm just me last night.

After a few sentences, I looked a their faces.

Never made it. I suddenly felt like a loser.

Confirmed.

I was eavesdropping a bit when I turned my back.

I heard something like: "Kakaiba siya" in a negative tune.

Great. I'm a positive person so I just went inside to get a few drinks and chat with the people I'm with.

I decided to have another bum when I saw them. Still outside.

I looked at them. I know I looked at them. They know I looked at them. And then I felt like its high school again.

I think di ako fine tuned last night. Kulang siguro sa tulog. Hmmm, ewan.

Am I being punk'ed or what? Hehe. Joke. Siguro na ka-Carmi Martin na ako...

I flunked 'Social Studies'..

So what? Hindi naman ako konyo..

There will always be a next time. I just have to mingle with the crowd I know and stay with people with no pretentions.